Blah!

4 am. Woke up from having a horrible dream about my brother and needless to say, there was no hope of going back to sleep so, I have been up and sitting here ever since. Not exactly the way I wanted to start my day off! Not only does it look like I am going to have one of those days where my brother is on my mind like crazy, but now I am going to be extremely tired, sleepy, and like I always am when I am tired, I will be ill at the world. Hopefully, I will be able to make the best of this long day ahead, and be able to blog tonight talking about how good of a day I actually ended up having. Hopefully being the key word in that last sentence.

One good thing about getting up at 4 am. Normally, my answer would be that there can't be anything good about waking up that early, but by me already being up when David got up to go to work, I did get to spend some time with him this morning. That is a never! I am a sleeper. I must have it, and must have a lot of it. Something that runs in our family because Trenton is the same way, and Derek was always the same. People say that we could sleep through the world coming to an end and never know it. Honestly, they are probably right!

Don't you hate it when you have seen something but then when you are looking for it, you cant find it? I have not been able to find my camera for 2 weeks now and it is driving me crazy! I love taking pictures and not being able to take any is eating me up. I know it is here.. I know it is. I took it with me on the trip to CT to get Derek's things, and when I got back I uploaded the pics of it, but now it is nowhere to be found. Although I have all of the pics uploaded onto my computer, it is really bothering me that I cant find it and the last pics I took with Derek are on that memory card. Strange because you would think that with me having them on the computer, that at least would keep me from freaking out about it. Not like I didn't upload them and now they are gone.... thankfully, I did. But I know it is here. I know I seen it somewhere. But I can not for the life of me figure out where I put it, or why I even apparently hid it from myself? You see, I am an extremely good hider. I put things up so that nothing will happen to them (important papers especially), and then when I need them, I cant remember where I put them. Most of the time, I never find them until we are in the process of moving. Then they always end up being in a place that I swore I looked a million times. But when it comes to anything else in life, I remember everything. And not only do I remember it, but I remember it in great detail. Something that could have some good use, but if it is one of the instances that tend to mind rape you at night, it is awful remembering it with so much detail.

And while I am on a roll, don't you hate it when people always feel like they have to out do the people around them? I mean, really... where in the world does that get you other than disappointed? You would think that with them complaining about money all of the time, they wouldn't dig themselves in an even deeper hole. To hear it from them, they do good to eat. Oh well, it really isnt any of my business. And THANKFULLY, I am in no way like this. The things I cherish most in life, no amount of money could ever buy.

Within the next few minutes, my morning of pokemon and giggles is about to start. Trenton absolutely loves pokemon! He gets so darn excited and tore up over it! He gives me tests about the characters, and always asks me which one is the fire type and which one has this and that, and the newest question: which one weighs the most? Diaga is the answer. :)

I can not wait for the weather to warm up this week! It is going to be beautiful! Sunday is supposed to be 78 degrees and sunny! Gosh, I can't wait! I just wish that it was my weekend for Trenton to be home so that we could go do something in this goregous weather they are calling for. I hate when he is gone. It literally kills me every other weekend. I get so homesick for him and of course, when I try to call and talk to him and never get an answer or a call back, it just crushes me even more. That is something that really angers me. Just because his dad doesnt call to talk to him, ever, does not mean I am the same way. But of course, he does no wrong!

If you havent noticed, I am not in the best spirits this morning. Sucks too because I was really hoping for a good day. Yesterday wasn't bad, but it wasn't great. Definitely wasn't anything like how I felt saturday and sunday. Hopefully this weather coming up will do something for me again. And since I am not in the best of moods and pretty much am just blogging because I am bored at this moment, and in a bad mood and just venting, I will cut this one here. Hopefully, tonights will be a different story.