As I mentioned in my last post, I have a bad habit of forgiving people. And be prepared, fore I am about to vent.
I used to be friends with someone who was much older than me and I really thought the world about her. She had been through some things in her past that were exactly that, the past. I never once degraded her for it, or ever acted any different towards her for it. I loved her personality, and loved being around her. We were nothing but giggles! Our kids had even gotten close and became best buddies. Trenton would spend the night at her house and he absolutely loved going there. We loved it so much that we were there nearly everyday for some reason or another which says a lot, because I never go to people's houses. They always comes to mind. A homebody I am! Well as some things started to fall apart in her life, she started to change. I noticed things about her that she was doing that I didn't agree with, but I stood beside her the whole way never putting her down for what she was doing. Although I seen her changing towards people in her life, I never seen it coming towards me. After a while I started picking up on things here and there, but was in denial because "we were too good of friends for her to be meaning it like that" Boy was I wrong! As even more time went on, I started to see a whole different side of her. The side that was the snake in the grass. And since we are no longer friends now, I have to admit, she is a damn sneaky snake in the grass because not only did I fall for it, everybody else in her life did too. Although she had some problems before I knew her, the blame was always put on her friend as being that problem. And as things fell apart between us because of her choices in life that were anything but good, I have realized that I became the scape goat in this one. I have realized EVERYTHING she did to me the whole time that I was too dumb to see, and what she continues to do to me. When people tell me everything she says about me, the oddest thing is that what she says is nothing but lies about me, but it is all the truth about herself. She has a way of making it seem like she would never be the type to do this or that when in all reality she was the one that was doing it. Don't get me wrong, it is okay to be ashamed of things you have done in the past, although she has made it a habit in her life by repeating the same things over and over, but don't play it off as if you would never do it and lie and blame it on someone else. It really blows me away that the things she says are everything she really did. I'm sure that she tells people that I am just blaming her. It really pisses me off. Pisses me of that I actually trusted her and thought so much of her. Pisses me off that I fell for it. Pisses me off that she continuously lies about me. And is pisses me off that when I see her in public I keep walking and never tell her what I think. I keep telling myself that one time or another it will come back to her. But with her ability to lie her way out of everything, people will only believe her until she shows her true colors to them. And it will take almost 1 year for her to do that. Atleast that is what her track record is with all of her other friends. Well I say friends, which she may have friends, but she is no friend to others.
It may be wrong of me posting all of this on here, but I can't help but resent her for some of the things she has done to me. I can forgive a lot of people for the things they have caused in my life, but she is one I don't see myself being able to forgive. Hopefully one day I will that way I will be able to let all of this go, but the way it looks, it won't be anytime soon. She has defaced my name by lieing on me and turning her true self and stories of her life into the stories of another's life. She is a miserbale soul. She always said it, and she has showed it to me more than once. And while saying that, I can't help but think of why I don't let it go? Being miserable sounds like a good enough punishment for what she has done to the lives of other people. I mean heck, I'm happier than ever. Something she would die to be like! So who really got the better end of the stick??? :)
No comments:
Post a Comment