If you had asked me how my day was about 3 hours ago, you probably would have had an ear full of word vomit pertaining to some not so friendly friends I have managed to occur in my short 26 year span of living. I normally do not use facebook as a place to vent my problems. For one, I get emotionally drained reading some of the things people post about on a daily basis. As I am sure you think the same thing at times when reading similar stories. Ya know, the girl who breaks up with her boyfriend more frequently than she tweezes her eyebrows, the one who always wants to post whatever dramatic event is going on in their life which seems to be a new tale every other hour, the couples who use facebook to get their point across to each other by leaving stats in reference to what a prick or
cunt emotional wreck the other may be acting like, and of course the one's who are always talking about their busy lives of shopping and running the roads yet they seem to always be posting and not from a cell phone. Which, I can't say much because I do post regularly myself. But I can give myself credit on one thing, I never go too deep into a post.
A.) I feel as if it is nobodies business most of the time.
B.) Nobody probably wants to hear it
C.) Some things are better left unsaid and just handled. Although this is how I feel about this most of the time and try to stick to these rules when it comes to posting, I did somehow manage to let myself slide tonight and vent about some things being said about me on the notoriously trashy website TOPIX. Dun dun dunnnnnn! If this speaks of how little I go to that website, I had to be informed that there was something about me on there or else I would have never known. Which, I actually am very grateful that I was informed that way I wasn't left out of the loop and looking even more like an idiot by being oblivious as to what is going on. As I read it, the first thing that went through my mind was "What in the world have I done to make someone start a thread about me on here?"... then as I read on a little more, I was actually relieved that the things that were said were really not bad at all. I was accused of being nasty... which when I think of nasty, I think of not bathing, or not wearing deodorant. Neither of which I am guilty of as most everyone else in the world is innocent of. Thank goodness! As I read, I have to admit that a few did bring a smile across my face. Who wouldn't smile when someone anonymously says they think you are pretty. When it is anonymous, you can't help but think that maybe it is someone that just knows you are, and not someone that is obligated to say it. And being that I have never been the type to look in the mirror and be able to think "Damn, I look good!", it feels nice to get a compliment. But as I read each post by obvious made up screen names, one in particular stood out to me. It was a name that is a phrase I have heard someone I know very well use many, many times throughout our history of knowing each other. No Big deal right? Well, I thought the same until another post was made by them and for some reason they accused me of posting something (I haven't figured out what they thought I had posted about myself just yet), and referred to me being skin and bones. They said a little more small talk with it in which was another thing they say far too often to go unnoticed when reading. To be honest, when I started realizing without a doubt who the real
backstabber person was that thought they were fooling me with this "secret identity", it hurt my feelings. Yes, I said it. My feelings got hurt. Why in the world would they be friends with me but feel this way and say these things about me? Wouldn't it just be easier to not like me than to have to act as if you do and call and smile to my face and then burn my name up on the end of your tongue as soon as you see my back turned? You know it would be! BUT, what fun would that be? To people like this, it wouldn't be fun. They are so bored and live such a dull life, that they feed off the lives of other people. They call and want to know what is going on with your every move and try to get you to tell them anything going on in your life regarding other people just so they will have something to talk about for a few days after hanging up the phone. If it weren't for your life, they would have no life. And while this does make me mad and hurt my feelings all at the same time, I find myself making it humorous. Is it me trying to just make myself feel better?
Possibly Yes. But I think it is almost comical that someone started it about me to begin with. What in the world kind of life do I have that makes you so interested in me? Here I think I have as down to earth of a life as you can get not doing much other than going to school and coming home, and that is still not good enough for certain people. I don't walk around like I am better than anybody because I don't feel that way towards people, nor do I trot around like I am too hot to handle because I know I am not. And while I try to keep this down to earth motto in my life, and somehow am lucky enough to have a select few who actually compliment me, I am automatically saying it about myself. Even funnier, as bad as I dislike having my name on that website for any purpose at all whether it be good or bad, for someone to think I would post on my own topic and keep pouring the gasoline in the fire, is absurd! I am wanting it to stop... not keep going! But after I started putting the fascinating, perfectly edged matching puzzle pieces together on who the real villain is in this hunt you down and break you game, I did just what they probably wanted, and assumed I had done the whole time. I posted. It was not mean, but to the point. Should I have done that? Probably not. But I by no means am not the type to sit back be walked all over. If I had no clue who it was, I probably never would have posted on it. But to know who it is doing it, and to sit back and let them think they are fooling me, I can not do. I bet you are wondering who it is? Now, if I told you, then wouldn't I be doing the same thing they are doing to me? Yes. Although I may be a lot of things in my life, I am no hypocrite. Without me having to call this person out by name, they know who they are. They will probably act as if they have no clue and of course like they would never do it, but we both know the truth. So for me to call them up and ask them about it would do nothing but waste precious minutes and breaths of my life. I already let them fuel my life for an hour spand earlier today, and after this blog it will no longer go on or happen again. Guarantee! So as of right now, it is over. I am over it.
I got my wish this morning... no school for Barren County! Whoot Whoot! :) I LOVE snow days with my little Trenton! Although while wishing for no school last night, it never dawned on me that I myself would still have class today. But no fear, Trenton Lane packed his mini quicksilver backpack with his Nintendo DS, Ipod Touch, earphones, hersheys kisses, a pop tart, and a few heart shaped valentine's day suckers and off to school he went with me. First let me start by saying that he was absolutely the most perfect acting child you have ever seen in your life today! Not a sound from him the entire class! He was so good that my teachers were bragging on him and told him he was welcome to come back anytime he needed to. Talk about one proud mommy when walking out of my classes today! While in between classes, we road over to sonic for a quick chili cheese tator tot snack and a perfectly chilled coca cola in a cup full of the best crushed ice in town. :) But all the while Trenton and I were having a perfect start to our day, we still couldn't shake our minds about Josie (our little yorkie). Starting last night, she has been just crying. Crying like I have never heard her do before. Honestly, I have never really heard her cry ever. This morning, the crying was never ending and so loud. She was just whimpering and crying out and kinda shaking all over which definitely told me that something was terribly wrong with her. Having to make the choice on going to class and not being late or taking josie to the vet and missing class at the very beginning of the semester, was not an easy one. I did choose class. But as soon as classes were over, Trenton and I came home and picked Josie up and went straight over to the vet. Day before yesterday she had managed to eat a foam ball to where it was no longer recognized as anything round but more like pieces of foam confetti spread throughout the house. At the time, none of us thought anything else about it. But after hearing her cry like she did this morning, the first thing that came to mind was that she had swallowed some of the foam and it was lodged in her somewhere.
At the vet she was still crying out here and there and after the story of the foam ball, the vet decided to keep her and take some x-rays and said they would call us when they were finished. After going to the dollar tree and racking up on some cute valentine craft essentials, and then over to walmart to find the notorious Arkeus (pokemon) Trenton has been dieing to find, which was a successful mission might I add, we realized we had yet to hear anything from the vet. We waited a little longer to give them plenty of time to do what they needed to do, and after a short time span we decided we couldn't wait any longer. While talking to Josie's Doctor, he suggested that she needed to spend the night so that they could give her an oral laxative to make sure she uses the bathroom and to make sure nothing was lodged in her. He said the x-rays looked fine, but with foam at times it is hard to pick up on in the x-rays, and being that she definitely had something bothering her, he thought it was in her best interest to stay. Of course, I agreed and also agreed to call back at 9 am to find out when to pick her up. After hanging up the phone, you would think someone just told me they were admitting my child into the hospital or something. I instantly became a nervous wreck! Poor little Josie! She has never stayed anywhere like that a day in her life. All I keep thinking is that she probably thinks we just gave her away and that she won't never see us again. Hopefully when I go to get her in the morning, she will assure me that she is not mad and forgive me by giving me a thousand little dog kisses with a tail wag as fast as a propeller on a high speed motor boat.
And in the end of all this rambling and craziness that has taken control over my mind this evening, I can honestly say, it's been a good day. And I am going to make sure that tomorrow is even better. So what if some people are talking about me. God didn't put me here for everyone to like me, or for me to like them either. He does make instances such as this happen so that I can learn and move forward in life and understand why some people were in my life, and why are no longer. Besides, if he didn't give me trials and diversions such as this in life, I really wouldn't be able to recognize how good I actually have it every other day of my life. Whether people like me or not, I am to a point in life that I love myself more than I ever have. For that I am very thankful, and for that, I will no longer let anybody break me!
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