It seems as though in the world we have today, there has been one more root of evil added to the list. Facebook. No longer is it the place to reconnect with long lost friends you once roamed the halls of your high school with, and no longer is it innocent. In all reality, it has actually turned into the easiest way to be stalked. The people that supposedly hate you so bad find it more amusing than anything else in life to facebook stalk you it seems. They dislike you so much that they would classify their feelings and emotions towards you as hate, but yet they want to read and dig into your profile as deep as possible in order to satisfy the craving of you they crave so deeply the same as a drug addict with their fix. I personally will never understand this because when I do not like someone, I honestly cant stand the feeling I get when hearing about them or looking at them therefore I have no need to cause this feeling on myself by finding every way I can possibly think of in order to dig into their life and be as nosy as the crazy cat ladies you hear about next door. I am a very forgiving person. Forgiving to a fault at times. I do not like controversy and I do not want any problems when it comes to people. I honestly try to treat people the way I would want to be treated and try to watch what I say and do to them. I guess that is why I find myself going to work and coming home and find myself talking to people less and less these days. Think about it... if you don't interact with too many people then you would think you wouldn't have problems with people. Good thought although it doesn't mean it always works out this way! And while I have always been a very forgiving person, I have never been one that was able to forget. I may never mention it to you again but that does not mean I have forgotten by no means. I forget nothing in life! I actually have come to terms with myself that in order to be able to forgive and forget, I have to do just that. I have to forgive the person for what they did, and I also have to forget them completely. Not just forget what they did to me, which I by no means will probably ever be able to do but forget the person. Having no interactions with the person and being able to forget about them as if they were never in existence in my life is the only way that I will be able to move on from what they have done to me. Is this the right way to be? Probably not. Does it work? Most definitely!! But in order to keep from rambling and in order to stay on task with the point I was getting at let me go back to the facebook idea. So you have problems with someone and they did some pretty hateful harsh things to you on facebook and for the world to view, you block them. You would think this would fix the problem right? Not. When they are blocked, they still find ways to look into your life and have people "spying" for them. And then the day comes to where they get balsy enough to make a whole other profile in order to send you yet another message. A message you care nothing about and a message you will never respond to. A message that was honestly a waste of time, energy and effort on their part. So why be so hateful and non forgiving towards this person when they have sent an apology to you if you are in fact such a forgiving person? I will tell you why. Because this person took being upset to a whole new level. Not only were they mad at me and saying very hurtful and bad things to me, they took it upon themselves to try and humiliate me. It's one thing for them to be at me but to intentionally take the energy and time to try and turn everybody else against me in order to feel as if they are the bigger, better person tells me everything I ever needed to know about this person that I was to naieve and blind to in the past. For them to take very personal things and "publish" it for the world to view and for them and their friends to get a wicked, warped laugh out of was wrong beyong wrong. Wrong to the degree that they in fact taught me the new way of life and the new definition of forgive and forget. Receiving messages from them does nothing but fuel my fire to really forget them. How dare them first of all to think that they could go on facebook and find a way to send me a message with an apology and trying to make it as though it was all their fault when I know in fact that is not the way they believe or think, and think that I am just going to be okay with it and act as if it is all okay. I honestly have found a new hate for facebook. Everything on their is as fake as the color on anna nicole's hair. You either have the people that want to use it as a daily diary to tell about their every move in life, or you have the people that use it as a venting station to let people know how sorry they feel for themselves. There is no longer and normalcy to facebook. When I think about it, it actually reminds me of my image of a chat room and how people are always blonde haired, blue eyed, in shape, and sexy knowing they are Z. absolutely NONE of the above. And ya know, I'm sure someone will read this and relay messages to people and the shit talking and anger will come back to some but I do not care anymore because just as I mentioned up above, while these people sit infuriated with anger and hate, I will not be. Maybe if you didn't nose up in people's lives and try to dig in deeper and deeper, you wouldn't find your thoughts and emotions getting covered in the dirt falling in on your head from the 6ft deep hole you are standing in. Forgetting someone allows you to be free. You have no desire to hear about them, hear from them, and no desire to read into their life. Maybe if they too could find it in them to be this way they wouldnt find themselves sucked into the condition they find their emotions in.
But enough with that! What about my luck?? I have strep throat. Why does it seem as soon as you get a new job everything that can go wrong, goes wrong? It's one thing to call in and at least enjoy your day off, but it is a whole other level to have to call in, get it counted against you, miss the pay, and also be sick and miserable on top of it. Hopefully these antibiotics will kick in soon and I will be back to myself and ready to work. Haha! Ready to work!! Who am I kidding? I hate that job!! lol
The zoo. I haven't been since I was a kid until wednesday and it was just as exciting to me then as it was when i was a kid! Not to mention, seeing Trenton so excited over the animals and watching him take pictures with his new camera naturally put me in the best mood. He was so careful with his camera and was so particular about how he put it in its case! He loves animals and seeing the amazement and fascination on his face was so sweet! He wants to be a veterinarian, zoologist, or marine biologist. You see, he wants to help sick animals, work at a zoo, and also swim with shamu so depending on which he finds to be more important and more of a desire will depend on what he actually becomes but I couldnt be more proud of his goals and ambitions! Especially to be 8 years old and be so adament on what he wants to do for the world!!! At least he has a desire to make a change! :) Sweet, sweet boy!! I really cant begin to describe what this little boy has done and continues to do for my heart and life. I honestly cant imagine what I would do without him in my life. Thinking about it, I dont understand or know how I ever made it without him in my life. I honestly have more respect for that little boy than I have most adults in my life.
Although I have tons more that I would love to talk about, I do believe I am actually going to try to get dressed and pray that it somehow psychs my mind out into making me believe that i feel better! :) Promise there will be more to come because I definitely have to share the arrangatang story from the zoo! :) Ta-Ta for now!!
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